A Day’s High Drama
Have those days that you can’t figure out what’s going on? You feel so disconnected and at the same time you are racing so fast you have no control over what you’re doing and why? That might seem weird to some people. That was me today. I felt like I was pinched between different gears as they are trying to work themselves out and in the process my brain was getting smashed.
This is not a foreign feeling for me. In fact until yesterday and today this was a fairly common feeling for me. I would say that almost every day of the last 20 years I could relate to it very well and the previous 10 I experienced it but not to the level that I did when my structure went away.
I think I understand what’s going on. Drama, confrontation, etc are things that people with AD/HD live with every day. In some cases they seek it out and look for it. I could say that was me to an extent. Now I don’t have to look for it, it finds me. One or two things - I can manage - but more than that - it’s starts to mount. 3 or 4 things I’m in getting full. Today it was 6 different projects, changes, responsibilities, etc. that wanted to push me over the edge. For some reason Tuesdays are always bad. I need to manage this better.
I say that but I know that it wasn’t me, it was the environment that felt like it had completely negated the benefits of my medicine. I need to get out of the panic mode. So I’m going to bed and get a full 8 hours of sleep, or close to it.
See you in the morning.
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